Recursive thinking.

I was going to head off today on thoughts about people I idolize, part II (which was the part I was heading for all along, and which I've been vaguely musing about through much of today), but I've gotten sidetracked by reading someone else's Live Journal.

It's odd thinking about how much has happened to me in the last two years.  (The LJ inspiring these musings is about that old.)  I've never been a reliable journal or diary-keeper -- I always liked the idea, but I always fell into the patterns of forgetting.

I think the idea of feedback and an audience (potential or realized) is what gives Live Journal its appeal-- the idea that someone else might be out there... even if they aren't.  It's rather like the appeal of a newsgroup or bulletin board, but it has the added merit that (ooo, shockeroo) if I don't expect anyone else to be interested in what I'm saying... I can put it up anyway.  I have real reinforcement and internal reinforcement and perceived reinforcement and... etc.

Big words, mind you, for someone who's only been doing this for the past two weeks.  It's got a weirdly addictive appeal, still.  (I know there are people who are addicted to reading news sites and newsgroups; I wonder if there are people who are addicted to reading Live Journal?)

I wonder if I'll still be doing this in two years?

If I am... will anything surprise me?  What will I think of my early entries?

(Probably that I'm a pompous bitch, but that opinion cycles somewhere in the back of my brain.  It keeps the rest of me sane-- it's rather like the slave on Caesar's chariot muttering, "Remember, lord, that you are only mortal."  Or whatever they kept saying.  The sentiment is right, even if the wording is flawed.)